Bacon Explosion!

ALL PHOTOS © 2009 Larry Clow. Used by permission.

Since I first read about The Bacon Explosion back in January, it’s lingered at the periphery of my dreams, beckoning and taunting me with promises of a painful, yet delicious, death. My friend Mike and I often joked about constructing the decadent bacony beast once summer hit, but would we really follow through with such a mad plan? Surely, insanity, heart disease and a sizeable grocery store bill were the only outcomes lying at the end of the path to The Bacon Explosion. And so we waited.

But the jokes soon took on a sharper edge and became less mirthful and more like a dare. Idle chatter became formal strategies, and as plans for my first big BBQ of the summer coalesced, The Bacon Explosion went from wistful daydream to greasy reality.

Here’s what you need to know: it takes two pounds of bacon, two pounds of sausage, some BBQ sauce and BBQ rub to create The Bacon Explosion, along with a strength of will and dedication to pork required of few mortals. This is a dish that only the most serious bacon fan should attempt; casual onlookers and armchair aficionados simply do not possess the wherewithal required to summon The Bacon Explosion from its unholy realm and into the mouths of hungry decadents.

The Recipe
You can read the original Bacon Explosion recipe here. We followed it mostly to the letter, with some minor improvisations listed below. The dudes who thought up The Bacon Explosion are mad geniuses and may possibly be time travelers from the future or aliens. Their motives for sharing such important bacon knowledge are unknown—will we use this valuable information to destroy ourselves or lead our planet to a new Golden Age? Only time will tell.

The Ingredients
Your Bacon Explosion is only as good as your ingredients. For the bacon weave that forms the outer layer, we used a thicker cut of bacon and relied on some more thinly cut bacon for the cooked bacon pieces that make the inner core. For the loose sausage, hit up your neighborhood deli and spring for the hot Italian sausage. (At my local deli, the dude behind the counter expressed shocked disbelief when informed how the sausage would be used. “But you’ll die of heart attacks!” he told my friend and I. We nodded solemnly and said we were willing to accept the risk.) As for the BBQ sauce and rub, go with what you like. We used Fatspice’s Lavaboy rub and some Stubb’s BBQ sauce.

The Preparation
A few pro-tips we learned while making The Bacon Explosion for the first time (you can follow along with the photos here):

• The original recipe calls for constructing the sausage layer directly on top of the bacon weave. We used a small piece of wax paper, about the size of the bacon weave, and placed the sausage layer on that. The paper was a huge help when it came to rolling the sausage layer, a task that was more difficult than anticipated and would have probably been way more onerous if done directly on top of the bacon weave.
• The reason for the difficulty? We made the sausage layer way too thick. Opt for a thinner, more tightly-packed sausage layer. (If Michael Scott from The Office were reading that sentence, his head would explode from the infinite opportunities for “That’s what she said!” jokes.
• You can’t have bourbon lying around the kitchen and not add it to whatever you’re cooking (and drink a few shots for yourself), and so we also added some bourbon to the sausage layer. This turned out to be a Good Idea. But use the bourbon sparingly, unless you want Old Granddad all over your kitchen table and not in your glass.
• You need a smoker to get The Bacon Explosion just right, but failing that, a good grill works just as well. I cooked The Bacon Explosion on a cedar plank on the top rack of my three-burner grill on low heat (about 150 F or so) for about three and-a-half hours, give or take.  Your cooking time may vary, depending on how giant your Bacon Explosion turns out.

Appetizers and Dessert
The Bacon Explosion isn’t just for eating; it’s a beacon of hope and inspiration to others. In the spirit of bacon fraternity, guests at the BBQ brought along a bacon sampler plate, made up of five different kinds of chewy, smoky bacon, and a breathtaking cake covered in a maple frosting loaded with pieces of bacon. Factoring in The Bacon Explosion, an estimated 7 pounds of bacon were consumed that day. A triumph of gastronomic excess, or a tragedy of wonton decadence? Let’s just call it a tasty tragedumphery and leave it at that.

The End Result
Of course, what really matters is the taste. Is The Bacon Explosion really the ultimate experience in bacon deliciousness? A thousand times, yes! Sweet, smoky, and spicy flavors abound, and once you get over the thrill of eating something that stands as the ultimate symbol of Western decadence, you’re left with a dish that quite simply tastes great. Smaller portions are advised, and though gluttony commands you otherwise, share with lots of friends. The cholesterol count on The Bacon Explosion is unknown, but most likely can only be expressed using theoretical numbers.  Viva bacon!

Larry Clow is a freelance journalist, technical writer and movie critic based in New Hampshire. You can find him online at blog.larryclow.com.