Uncomfortable Plot Summaries for Famous Movies and TV Shows

by E. Christopher Clark | Thursday, August 20, 2009

“Physically abused, retarded man finds love with overweight preteen.”

That is just one of the fantastically hilarious “Uncomfortable Plot Summaries” found at (postmodernbarney.com), a site we discovered today thanks to good old Jason Kottke. What is that one a summary of? Why, The Goonies, of course.

Here are few more of our favorites:

BATMAN: Wealthy man assaults the mentally ill.

DEBBIE DOES DALLAS: Cheerleaders develop valuable entrepreneurial skills.

GHOSTBUSTERS: Unemployed college professors destroy hotel with nuclear weapons.

HARRY POTTER: Celebrity Jock thinks rules don’t apply to him, is right.

LOVE ACTUALLY: Prime Minister risks war with United States over a sexy secretary.

SNOW WHITE AND THE SEVEN DWARFS: Layabout stepdaughter shacks up with seven miners.

STAR WARS: EMPIRE STRIKES BACK: Boy is abused by midget, kisses sister, attempts patricide

TITANIC: Crazy old widow disregards lifelong memories of husband, children, and grandchildren in favor of that one time she fucked a bum.

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