New Get a Mac Ads Sadly Do Not Feature Tyra Banks and Janice Dickinson

Apple did, in fact, release two new “Get a Mac” ads on April 1. But, sadly, they did not feature Janice Dickinson as the decrepit Windows 3.1-running PC as our spies had indicated they would. We are willing to admit that featuring Miss Guided star Judy Greer as a yoga instructor in one of them was a nice consolation prize.

Thanks to The Unofficial Apple Weblog for breaking the news to us.

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Apple TV DVR - So What?

Electronista asks whether Apple is developing live Apple TV recording in an article posted today. I’ve included one of the mock-ups that Apple included with their recent filings with the US Patent and Trademark Office.

Personally, as an Apple TV owner, I’m not too bothered or too excited by this. I’m sure that it’ll be hardware upgrade if it ever happens (as opposed to the recent software upgrade), meaning that my current generation unit will become “irrelevant” or something, but I’m not sweating it. I’ve never been too excited about DVRs. I got into the whole craze with the HP Media Center PC that I bought back in 2003, but that thing’s TV tuner crapped out on me within a year, and I was always trying to come up with ways to cut commercials and get the video onto my TV. It was too much damn work. I likes me the iTunes Store, which delivers commercial-free copies of my favorite shows direct to my TV with just a few button clicks. I don’t have to worry about poor broadcast quality, irritating commercials, or figuring out where to store my shit. And I don’t ever have to buy the DVD, because I already have the whole season on my hard drive, long before the DVD is even in stores. 

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The Beatles on iTunes Rumor Mill

United Press International says that the music of the Beatles is finally coming to iTunes. It’s the same story that we’ve heard at least once a week, every week, since Apple, Inc. and Apple Corps Ltd. settled their differences in February 2007. Only this time it comes complete with a snarky headline: “McCartney cashes in on Beatles’ catalog.”

Sing, Muse, of my swelling hatred for the tabloids and of the way that they grossly misrepresent facts in order to sell papers.

McCartney cashes in? What about Ringo Starr? What about the family of George Harrison? What about Yoko Fucking Ono? No, let’s just focus on Paul and how he’s doing this to pay for his divorce settlement. As if Paul McCartney were the sole decision maker here…

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Need A Man? The Apple Store is The Place To Be!

While most Apple junkies are salivating over news of what will come out of Thursday’s iPhone SDK “roadmap” event, I am more concerned with another bit of news that TUAW brought us over the weekend. Apparently, Cosmopolitan magazine says that the Apple Store is a great place to pick up a guy. Ladies and gents, do we really believe this to be true? Here’s what Cosmo says:

Most guys are natural gadget lovers, and with sales of iPods and MacBooks skyrocketing, more men than ever are stopping by Apple boutiques. The vibe at the stores is conducive to man meeting too: You can check your email among cuties, take a free workshop on anything from Photoshop to podcasting (a great opportunity to strike up a conversation), or just survey the, ahem, good-looking merchandise.

Okay, sure, many men love gadgets. But are the types of men who actually hang out at the Apple Store the types of men that women who read Cosmo are interested in? My guess would a big fat no, unless these are alums of Beauty and the Geek we’re talking about here.

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