Ryan Seacrest To Host Three-Way

Ryan Seacrest will host a special three-way American Idol competition, Geek Force super-spies have learned. The competition will be between Sarah Silverman, Jimmy Kimmel, and Elizabeth Banks, each of whom has made a splash in the music industry this year with their “I’m Fucking So-and-So” songs. Silverman, of course, started the trend with “I’m Fucking Matt Damon.” Kimmel shot back at Silverman with “I’m Fucking Ben Affleck.” And Banks trumped the both of them by proclaiming loudly and proudly, “I’m Fucking Seth Rogen.”

Producers are in talks with Simon Cowell, Randy Jackson, and Paula Abdul to reprise their roles as absolutely horrid judges of American musical talent.

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Frat Pack Upcoming Movie Grading Guide

My brother-in-law Alex was the first person to ever use the term “frat pack” in a conversation with me, and I actually thought that he didn’t know what he was talking about when he explained that the members of the group included both Judd Apatow, who I think is a genius, and Ben Stiller, who I think is probably the worst thing to happen to American cinema in the last two hundred years (except, maybe, for Owen Wilson, who might be worse). So, I went home and looked up the term on Wikipedia. And sure, enough, Alex was not bullshitting me. There is such a thing as the Frat Pack.

And now, according to New York Magazine’s Vulture, there is apparently a definitive way to tell if a film featuring these fine folks will be any good or not.

Forgetting Sarah Marshall is also written by an Apatow acolyte, Freaks & Geeks vet Jason Segel (3), who also stars along with Undeclared’s Carlo Gallo (1.5). Sadly, it’s directed by Nicholas Stoller (-2). We are promised wangs, “several scenes,” so let’s say three minutes (3). No big stars, but Kristen Bell is at least as proven an actress as Katherine Heigl (3). That gives us a relatively solid movie, with a total score of 8.5 — somewhere between Anchorman and The 40-Year-Old Virgin. Not bad!

Any other Apatow fans up in hee-ah? What do you think?

[Via Kottke]

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Zack and Miri Have a Release Date?

CinemaBlend.com is reporting that Zack and Miri Make a Porno has a release date. Their source (Box Office Mojo) says that the next film by Kevin Smith will be released on October 31, 2008. There’s no word yet from Kevin or News Askew on this, so I’m holding back judgment until I hear it from the horse’s mouth. But, if it turns out to be true, I’m with Josh Tyler at CinemaBlend. October 31 is not a good release date. You don’t want to be competing with the latest horror flick for the same young male audience that you’re hoping to pull in, at least not on that date. On any other day of the year, the young men are going to choose porno over horror. But on Halloween, all bets are off.

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Is The Word ‘Porno’ Dangerous?

USA Today has some early scoop on Kevin Smith’s next flick says FirstShowing.net. But, aside from the photo I’ve included above—which is quite amusing, I must admit—color me disappointed. Most of the article focuses on how calling the film Zack and Miri Make a Porno could be damaging at the box office.

Seriously? We’re worried about the American public staying away from a film with the word ‘porno’ in the title. It’d be one thing if it was Zack and Miri Shoot a Gangbang or Zack and Miri Film a Circle-Jerk. But Zack and Miri Make a Porno? We’re seriously worried about that? Didn’t the Academy Award for Best Screenplay just go to a former stripper. Do we not live in a world where a sex-tape actually increases the popularity of a somebody who should still be a nobody? Red light culture has been on the rise since at least 2003. Porno is not a naughty word. The word piques interest. It’s not going to drive people away, not any more. It’s going to bring them in. As that dude from the Men’s Wearhouse commercials says, “I guarantee it.”

On the other hand, USA Today’s Dispatches from the set feature is well worth checking out. Topic #1 is “Preparing for a sex scene,” and both Banks and Rogen offer some amusing thoughts on the subject.

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Elizabeth Banks is Fornicating with Seth Rogen

Not to be outdone by View Askew alums Matt Damon and Ben Affleck, VA-mastermind Kevin Smith brings us Elizabeth Banks singing ”I’m Fucking Seth Rogen.” Unlike the Ben and Matt videos though, there’s no bleeping here. So, be sure to stay away from this one at work, unless you’ve got a good pair of headphones.

And, in case you’re wondering where this came from—because, really, who in their right mind would want to bone Seth Rogen?—this video also serves as a first glimpse into what’s going on behind the scenes during the filming of Kevin Smith’s next film, Zack and Miri Make a Porno. 

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