Archives by Tag: TV
Tyra and Janice Team Up for New ‘Get a Mac’ Ad Campaign
Editor’s Note: In case the date-stamp didn’t make it clear, this article was part of GF5’s April Fool’s Day Joke for 2008.
Geek Force insiders have learned that renaissance woman Tyra Banks and her former America’s Next Top Model cohort Janice Dickinson will join forces to collaborate on a new series of “Get a Mac” ads for Apple, Inc. It is unknown at this time whether or not “Get a Mac” vets John Hodgman and Justin Long will be included in the clips, but the plot synopsis our spies have uncovered details a scenario wherein Janice Dickinson, playing the part of the PC, becomes so flustered with Vista that she downgrades to Windows 3.1. Tyra Banks, playing the part of the Mac, insults the decrepit supermodel by telling her that she’s so old her 286-running ass couldn’t even boot Windows 95, and that she should just stop lying to herself about “downgrades” and accept that she belongs in a museum. Rumor has it that the first honest-to-goodness catfight in Apple advertising history will ensue.
Topics: Apple
Heidi Montag to Star in New Marvel Comic: THE INCREDIBLE IMPLANTS
Editor’s Note: In case the date-stamp didn’t make it clear, this article was part of GF5’s April Fool’s Day Joke for 2008.
Insiders at Marvel Comics tell us that reality television celebrity and twenty-something musical genius Heidi Montag will continue her quest for world domination by starring in an upcoming comic book entitled The Incredible Implants.
“Joey Q, (Joe Quesada, Marvel’s editor-in-chief), couldn’t be more excited about this idea,” writes our inside source. “He’s running around the office telling people that this has never been done, that Montag’s character is going to be the biggest thing since Dazzler, and certainly a bigger hit than the Jenna Jameson-inspired Shadow Hunter that Virgin Comics is putting out.”
Montag’s superpowers will apparently be derived from her breast implants. They will apparently be laced with adamantium, the same indestructible metal which is bonded to popular Marvel hero Wolverine’s skeleton, and will also, apparently, be bombarded by gamma radiation, the same energy source which brought the Incredible Hulk to life.
“Her boobs are going to act as both armor-plating and as projectile energy weapons,” says our man inside. “This one is going to be a real winner.”
Dr. McDreamy to guest star on LOST
Editor’s Note: In case the date-stamp didn’t make it clear, this article was part of GF5’s April Fool’s Day Joke for 2008.
Anonymous, inside sources at ABC have confirmed for Geek Force Five that Dr. McDreamy himself, Patrick Dempsey, will guest star on the hit show Lost when it returns on April 24 to finish out its fourth season.
“Dempsey will play the same character he plays on Grey’s Anatomy,” writes our insider. “When Jack Shephard leaves the island as part of the Oceanic Six, Derek Shepherd (Jack’s long-lost brother?!?) will be deposited onto the beach of Lost’s island by the so-called ‘magic box’.”
His first flashback will reportedly center on a summer during his undergraduate days when, during the course of performing his duties as a pizza delivery boy, he provided “special services” to female customers who ordered pies with extra anchovies. If he survives the blockbuster season finale, a follow-up episode in the fifth season would focus on an incident from his high school career. Apparently, back then, he was the one paying for “special services”, having used money that he’d set aside for a telescope to buy the affections of a nubile classmate who’d accidentally spilled wine on her mother’s priceless suede jacket.
“If you loved Nikki and Paulo, you’re going to love him,” writes our source.
Live Action Simpsons Movie
Big ups to my pal Sara for pointing me in the direction of Filmonic’s casting ideas for a live-action Simpsons film. I’m particularly fond of the decision to cast William H. Macy as Ned Flanders and Ian McDiarmid as Mr. Burns.
Last Time on Lost: Meet Kevin Johnson
Teasing tonight’s episode for Entertainment Weekly’s Doc Jensen, Lost executive producer Damon Lindelof says… oh, waitaminute, one of our Geek Force interns just came in to deliver some terrible, terrible news. He tells me, not only is this not a Thursday (the night Lost airs here in the U.S.), but that there will be no new episodes of Lost until April 24, and therefore no weekly teases from Damon Lindelof. Oh, man! What the hell am I going to do with myself?
Rewatch the episodes that have already aired, apparently. Here, below the fold, are some of my thoughts on the last episode of Lost that aired here in the United States, “Meet Kevin Johnson.” These should have been up last week, but I stuffed so many envelopes last week that it sapped my will to blog.
